-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 71720 | BRANNEAT     | CHATTER              | 10/30/95 | 11/13/95 |    30    |
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| Description: an oldie but goodie...                                          |
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what follows is an 'application' that was originally posted in the spring
of 1990.  it has been periodically reposted over the years and has
always gotten new replys.  following it are all the replys i've gotten .
some are people you'll recognize, some are long gone.  all are amusing.
the newer ones are at the end.  joker's is a definite must read :)
i'm posting this all at once so it's easier to skip for those not interested.
if you want to reply but don't have the quota to do so, e-mail me and i'll
send you a copy of just the application.
 
--mav
********************************************************************************
 
 
 
 
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):
ADDRESS:
PHONE NUMBER:
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
BIRTHDATE:
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):
BEST PICKUP LINE:
BEST BREAKUP LINE:
SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)
                               2)
                               3)
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR:
FAVORITE FOOD:
FAVORITE SONG:
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING:
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE:
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
****************************************************************************
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
     ^^^^^^^^
    Ride me horsey, ride me.
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):  Jason Christopher Brannen aka "Magii" aka "Magii-Milkman"
aka "Lesser Undies" aka "B" (and it's only half full, so Nyah.)
ADDRESS:  641 Walnut Lane  Harrisonburg, VA 22801 USA  Earth, Sol System, Milky
Way.  1973-1993 (as of now)
PHONE NUMBER: 703-564-0128
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): XXX-XX-XXXX, XXX-XX-XXXX, XXX-XX-XXXX (check with the
 IRS to see which one they have currently assigned me.)
BIRTHDATE: 3-31-73 (Old chicken make best soup.)
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): S_   M_x_   L_   XL_ (don't want to overrate
 myself)
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): Wordsmith of Gaming/Become a stud-dog.
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 52
BEST PICKUP LINE: "Hi."
BEST BREAKUP LINE: N/A
SAT SCORES:  MATH__ 590  VERBAL_ 650  COMBINED__ 1220
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  Summer '93
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): "That would be telling." (and
 keeping score)
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)  Female.
                               2)  Bed.
                               3)  Wild Paisely Ties.
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  I left school, so who needs the classes.  I left to
 get "real world experience".  Gimme.
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  How about the next time I see you?
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
 Because maybe I could teach you a thing or two...?
 
FAVORITE COLOR: Green
FAVORITE FOOD: Mom's Italian cooking
FAVORITE SONG: "Moon over Bourbon Street" by Sting
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Having sex is good enough.  Who needs to play
 favorites?  I think they all should get equal time for equal pay and
 equal work.
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: 12 (as of Summer '92)
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 I need to be accepted?  Fuck this.  I should start my own school.
 
 
SIGNATURE: J____ B______
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
 
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>NAME (FULL):  Robin Stuart Furr
>ADDRESS: hoffman 125
>PHONE NUMBER: x5254
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
>BIRTHDATE: 07-29-70
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): not on bb thank you
*editors note:  now available upon request*
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): to be a published author(both)
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 92%
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "So, wanna come up an see mah etchings sometime?"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "huh?"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH_730   VERBAL_760  COMBINED_1490
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: not lost/who knows
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): uh...?
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)Trivial Pursuit
>                               2)Balderdash
>                               3)To Tell The Truth
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: well...
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: real soon?
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
i'm 19. i'm getting desperate.
>FAVORITE COLOR: blue-grey
>FAVORITE FOOD: chicken livers, or chili
>FAVORITE SONG: "Slime Creatures from Outer Space"
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: huh?
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: 1
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>SIGNATURE: r0b Frr
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
 
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>NAME (FULL):Todd "Thick Dick long schlong treestump tripod" Strong
>ADDRESS:follow the slug trail
>PHONE NUMBER:433-2CUM
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):nonya
>BIRTHDATE:old enuff to know better young enuff to break the roolz
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):larger than your mind can comprehend
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):you know... this and that
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):.00000001
>BEST PICKUP LINE:hey bitch! wanna f*ck
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:get the f*ck outta my face willya
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ never took them.  too cool for roolz
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:cunt remember
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): another incredibly large number
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)ball peen hammer
>                               2)circular saw
>                               3)broken coke bottle
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:when ever you have the time to learn
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:see above
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):don't need classes but I'm
>                                                  offering
>FAVORITE COLOR:p-lip pink
>FAVORITE FOOD:snatch salad
>FAVORITE SONG:f*ckin' in da but by david alan coe
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:anyone that makes my partner scream in sweet pain
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING:not of this earth
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:acceptance?
>I don't need to be accepted...
>SIGNATURE: thick'n'weighty
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:  THE FOLLOWING
>
>NAME (FULL):  SHANNON D. DOVE
>ADDRESS: GETTYSBURG
>PHONE NUMBER: DON'T HAVE A NUMBER, IT'S WHITE
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): OKAY
>BIRTHDATE: DIDN'T HAVE A DATE AT MY BIRTH, WENT FOR PIZZA THE DAY AFTER
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): --------------------------------------
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): TO EAT FREE FOOD
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 46 (no joke)
>BEST PICKUP LINE: CHEVROLET S-10 SERIES
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: BYE.
>SAT SCORES:  MATH 69   VERBAL 69  COMBINED 69
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: IF I KNEW, IT WOULDN'T BE LOST
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): WHICH NIGHT?
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) RUBBER DUCKY
>                               2) FLOPPY DISK
>                               3) GOBOT
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>FAVORITE COLOR:
>FAVORITE FOOD: FREE
>FAVORITE SONG:
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: ##
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>SIGNATURE: fromthebadlands
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>NAME (FULL): James Michael Wachhaus
>ADDRESS: A galaxy far far away
>PHONE NUMBER: 568-3825
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): pi
>BIRTHDATE: January 27, 1969
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): type cast for Equus
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): not applicable
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 34
>BEST PICKUP LINE: You have GOT to see my Alarm Clock!
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: I love you.  (no joke.)
>SAT SCORES:  MATH_650_   VERBAL_650_  COMBINED_Add you idiot!_
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: When love is a four letter word.
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): ?
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) My tongue
>                               2) HER tongue
>                               3) the rest of her
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: 2 to 5 A.M. are average fuck-times
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: see above.
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): Girls aren't icky anymore.
>FAVORITE COLOR: Violition
>FAVORITE FOOD:I laughed here.  :)
>FAVORITE SONG: Tra La La Boom De A
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Any
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: 11 (seriously)
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: I bathe
                                                                     regular.
>SIGNATURE: VermN
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):Robert David Woodington
ADDRESS:chandler 211A, p.o.5939
PHONE NUMBER:568-7147
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):XXX-XX-XXXX
BIRTHDATE:5/9/71
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):somewhere between four and twelve......
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):to live to see tomorrow
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):81...but i need to retake
            it, havent in awhile and i know its gone down...probably mid to
            upper seventies.
BEST PICKUP LINE:never used one
BEST BREAKUP LINE:same as above
SAT SCORES:  MATH__730?   VERBAL_540?  COMBINED__1270
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:ill get back to you on that one...
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):same as above
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)thought id learn about these in my classes ;)
                               2)
                               3)
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:basically any evening after nine...can supply a full
                       schedule if accpeted in the school ;)
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:what day is tomorrow?
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):why not?
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR:blue
FAVORITE FOOD:twinkies
FAVORITE SONG:anything older than 1975
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:any involving intercourse
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   not yet... RATING:
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
ive got big hands, big feet, and a tongue larger than most european countries.
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE: the whistler
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): Andrew Mark Lewis (Drew or Scruffy)
ADDRESS:Wise 101
PHONE NUMBER:568-4191
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):XXX-XX-XXXX
BIRTHDATE:7/08/70
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): long enuff to get the job done
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): career: have enough money to live
comfotably, and yet do my part to help people
personal: to finally love someone, and add to the world's population
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 42
BEST PICKUP LINE: Hi
BEST BREAKUP LINE: Bye
SAT SCORES:  MATH__730   VERBAL__640  COMBINED__1370
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: April 11, 1988
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): i can't count it on my fingers
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) a person of the other sex
                               2) handcuffs
                               3) whipped cream or other edible substance
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: you name it
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: tomorrow soon enuff?
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): hey...you can learn
something new every time
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR: black
FAVORITE FOOD: pizza--pepperoni/green pepper or ham and pineapple
FAVORITE SONG: Lovesong (Extended Remix)
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: 69
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes  RATING: 7.5
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: does the
teacher want to learn anything?
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE: Scruffy the Cat
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):  Arjay R. Wright
ADDRESS:  Hoffman 125
PHONE NUMBER:  x5254
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
BIRTHDATE:  06/02/70
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  beg pardon?
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  Clinical Psychology, to receive and
                                     give love (marriage & children optional),
                                     to help ppl.
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  79%
BEST PICKUP LINE:  Are you a virgin?
BEST BREAKUP LINE:  Why????
SAT SCORES:  MATH  600   VERBAL  600  COMBINED  1200  (as of '87)
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  october '89
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):  once
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)  who
                               2)    needs
                               3)       toys?  ;)
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  evenings after 5.
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  02/03/90
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
   1) i need more experience..
   2) i want to learn "how to win friends and get babes"  ;)
   3) i like you.  :)
   4) why not?
FAVORITE COLOR:  blue
FAVORITE FOOD:  hmm.. italian - lasagna, pizza, spaghetti..
FAVORITE SONG:  "Somebody" by Depeche Mode
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  NA
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?  not to my knowledge
  RATING:  NA
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
  eager and willing pupil.  learn fast.  no diseases.
 
 
SIGNATURE:  Ajay Wrigt  (i have a sloppy signature  :) )
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):
John Paul Ashenfelter
ADDRESS:
Spotswood 8
PHONE NUMBER:
x7500
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
XXX-XX-XXXX
BIRTHDATE:
June 6, 1990
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):
some things should be discovered for oneself
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):
happiness and fulfillment for myself and others
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):
62
BEST PICKUP LINE:
hey honey
BEST BREAKUP LINE:
bye darlin
SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__
   720     730        1450
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: quite a while ago
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):
per person, average, or total?
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)redheads
                               2)brunnetes
                               3)blondes
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:
i'm sure you can "fit me in" when it's convienent
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:
how soon will you be ready
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
seems a shame to pass up a bargain like this!
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR:dark
FAVORITE FOOD:something lickable
FAVORITE SONG:anything with a beat
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:female on top
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? several  RATING: avg: 10
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
are any more neccessary?
 
SIGNATURE: johnpashenfelter
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):John Cooley
ADDRESS:on campus
PHONE NUMBER:in book
BIRTHDATE:feb 5th
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):Big enough to make girls spueal.
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):none currently
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):below 34
BEST PICKUP LINE:"Wanna go make out."
BEST BREAKUP LINE:"Study me, I'm history"
SAT SCORES:  MATH 720   VERBAL 590  COMBINED 1310
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:not sure
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):
28 people, number of times well over 200
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)Hand cuffs
                               2)whip
                               3)Knife
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:None, don't need em.
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:I'd like to teach.
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):I like to educate females.
FAVORITE COLOR:black&blue
FAVORITE FOOD:Bearded Clam
FAVORITE SONG:Hang the Pope
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:
Doesn't have a name but it's similar to doggie style, in a way.
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING:10
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):  William Lee Howard, Jr.
ADDRESS:  I could never remember; is it address or adress?
PHONE NUMBER:  666-6969
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): square root of 3
BIRTHDATE:  4/22....69
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  Never measured.
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  Field
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  42.6
BEST PICKUP LINE:  So, you wanna fuck, or what?
BEST BREAKUP LINE:  Well, like, y'know, the way it is, see...
SAT SCORES:  MATH__640   VERBAL_690  COMBINED__1000
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  Many moons ago...
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):  n approaches infiniti
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)  Foodstuffs
                               2)  Bathrobe ties
                               3)  Cat o' nine tails
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  Never free...$40 per session
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  about three years ago
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  Mav desperately needs
training
 
FAVORITE COLOR:  black & blue
FAVORITE FOOD:  vaginal excretions
FAVORITE SONG:  Let's Go to Bed...The Cure
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  Mavvie-style
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?yes   RATING:pi squared
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE: SPACEMAN SPIFF
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):  Joseph W. Shelby        (Joe)
ADDRESS:  2123 Horace Ave, Abington PA 19001     (local: Chandler 115)
PHONE NUMBER:  215-576-6224                      (local: JMU-7121)
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): ***-**-****
BIRTHDATE:  Sept 17, 1970
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  long enough
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  Computer Applications of Thermodynamics
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  68.something
BEST PICKUP LINE:  So...You live around here often?
BEST BREAKUP LINE:  And thats my final offer
SAT SCORES:  MATH__780   VERBAL_570  COMBINED__1350
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  Jan 28, 1990
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):  lost track after Valentine's Day
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)  Red Heads
                               2)  Teddy Bears
                               3)  Rubber Ducky's
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  after 10 p.m., most nights
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  anytime
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  why not?
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR:  Green
FAVORITE FOOD:  Steak
FAVORITE SONG:  can't limit to just 1
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  haven't decided yet...
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Yes  RATING: 3
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE:  joe
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):  Scott McDaniel
ADDRESS: 29 Neibolt St.    Derry, ME    00243
PHONE NUMBER: (202) 432-1101
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): XXX-XX-XXXX
BIRTHDATE: 2/6/70
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  1 rod
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  3 goals scored in 11 seasons (life to date)
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  83.8
BEST PICKUP LINE:  shit this is heavy!!!
BEST BREAKUP LINE:  but we can still be friends....  (ug)
SAT SCORES:  MATH__ 640  VERBAL_ 700 COMBINED__ can't you add?
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  still live in virginia
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):  pi
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) barbie
                               2) feather duster
                               3) six foot snow sculptures
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  I always cost money, dear
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  I'm already dating someone, thanx
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
 
   Sorry, I've already got a ASA licenced instructor
             (American Sexual Association)
 
FAVORITE COLOR:  magenta
FAVORITE FOOD:  anything not in D-hell
FAVORITE SONG:  Awaken    by     YES
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: generally pro
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Nope.   RATING:
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
           Hope you've got a LOOONNNGGG time set aside...
 
 
SIGNATURE:        Rrh
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
From: VAX1::STU_ADTAYLOR "Remember...never reuse a condom." 15-APR-1990
To: BRAD
CC:
Subj:
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): brad l graham
ADDRESS: spotswood 29
PHONE NUMBER: x4865
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
BIRTHDATE: june 14 68
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): you'll just have to find out
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 73 or so
BEST PICKUP LINE: n/a (none of them ever work)
BEST BREAKUP LINE: never dumped anyone never used such a line
SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: sept. 89
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):3
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)
                               2)
                               3)
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: when joe's not around
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: soon as you are willing
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
you sent this, so it must be a big hint.
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR: blue
FAVORITE FOOD: pizza
FAVORITE SONG:
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: only tried one
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING:
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
drop by if you want to begin _classes_.
 
 
 
SIGNATURE:
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
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| 48708 | STU_MLGRIGSB | PERSONALS            | 06/02/93 | 06/09/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 48696: guess what....I'M SINGLE AGAI                   |
================================================================================
 
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
 >NAME (FULL): Michael L. (misha/catullus) grigsby
>ADDRESS:wherever the money is
>PHONE NUMBER:1-900-HOT DICK
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):669-69-6969
>BIRTHDATE: 6/9/69
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):6.9"
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):   Career:  classical philologist/whore
     Personal:  to sleep with tom cruise
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE)ummmmm.... 40 i think
>BEST PICKUP LINE:"enough with the schonberg, already!"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  "yeah, whatever"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH 650__   VERBAL740_  COMBINED_1390_
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: when harvey fierstein still looked decent....
 
                                                partners or times??? partners=
 many.... times (including masturbation) at least 6000
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):
 
 
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) gerbils
>                               2) hamsters
>                               3) rabbits
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: "there's always room for jell-o"
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: immediately
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): "there's always room for
 Jell-o"
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR:yellow
>FAVORITE FOOD: sushi (specifically onugi [eel, whatever it is in japanese])
>FAVORITE SONG: tie between "love to hate you" by erasure, "blue" by latour
 and "use it up and wear it out" by pat & mick
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:upside down from a fire escape
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?y   RATING:17
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
i'm a diligent worker.
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 48696 | STU_ADTAYLOR | PERSONALS            | 06/01/93 | 06/15/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: guess what....I'M SINGLE AGAIN!!   ;)                           |
================================================================================
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL):Van Camp, David James
ADDRESS:Wonderland
PHONE NUMBER:433-5197
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
BIRTHDATE:6/18/70
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):Inquire for details
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):career: English Professor/Actor/Poet Laureate
personal: Increase degree of harmony in self and others
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):37
BEST PICKUP LINE:"Let's change the subject"
BEST BREAKUP LINE:"I have a crobar in the back room.  Don't make me use it"
SAT SCORES:  MATH 550   VERBAL 650 COMBINED 1300
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:Female:19  Male:21
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):4/4
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)silk bandanas
                               2)multipurpose massager
                               3)jar of honey
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:negotiable
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:sometime next week
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):For sharing excitement,
pleasure and skill with a person who knows what he or she wants
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR:Peuce
FAVORITE FOOD:Home-made pasta in cream sauce
FAVORITE SONG:Theme song from "Phantom"
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:"put your legs up, dear"
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Y  RATING:9.8
(another reason for taking classes is to get to 10)  }:)
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 I've received several compliments on my goatee.
 I have a greater understanding of the female side of the relationship
   than most males.
 I don't get jealous.
 Bicycling on a regular basis builds endurance.
 I remember to leave the toilet seat down and cover up the partner after
  s/he has passed out.
 I cook great omelettes
SIGNATURE:(scribblescribblescribble)
 
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 48748 | STU_JGDRUMMO | PERSONALS            | 06/07/93 | 06/21/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 48696: guess what....I'M SINGLE AGAI                   |
================================================================================
 
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:   Ok, if you say so.
>
>NAME (FULL):  James Gatsby 0mar III
>ADDRESS: 244 Duval Street Key West, Fl
>PHONE NUMBER: What phone?
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): I am an illegal alien.
>BIRTHDATE: cloned on Dec. 30, 1989
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): 7.779823412 in.
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): To kill Salman Rushdie/To get laid just
one more time
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 42
>BEST PICKUP LINE: Nice Shoes. Wanna fuck?
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: ***BOOOOM!***
>SAT SCORES:  MATH?   VERBAL?  COMBINED 1310
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: when I was Fourt Teen
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): enough.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) women
>                               2) my right hand
>                               3) my left hand
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: anytime
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: now
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): To teach you so you may
better educate
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: purple
>FAVORITE FOOD: couscous
>FAVORITE SONG: All I Want Is You by Aura of Charisma
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: In
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: Oh, God, do that
again!!!
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>    I will kill you otherwise.
>
>
>SIGNATURE: This is a computer. It is not equipped with a touch-sesitive
screen.
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME. Don't bet on it.

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| 52104 | STU_DRANDERL | PERSONALS            | 10/11/93 | 10/17/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52043: here we go again...                             |
================================================================================
 
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): JOSE~
>ADDRESS: 42 Brandon Ln.  Beverly Hills, CA 90210
>PHONE NUMBER: 976-JOSE  ($2.99 per min.-must be over 18)
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): 987-65-4321
>BIRTHDATE: every year
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): varies
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): sign up for a May session course that has
                                     _something_ to do with my major.
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  98.6
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "I want a commitment."
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:"I want a commitment."
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__  Never took SAT's
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: unbeknownst
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Read _Song of Solomon_ once.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) `Sit and Spin'
>                               2)  Lucky Charms
>                               3)  Anything found in Sears
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: negotiable
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: Nov. 25, 1955  <--can anyone guess this?
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>I don't- I just thought this would be fun to fill out.
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Magenta
>FAVORITE FOOD: coffee
>FAVORITE SONG: "Seven Days"- Sting
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Managerial
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? no  RATING: I said, "no!"
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>This is one of the funnier things I've seen on CHATTER in a while.
>Thanx- you've cheered me up.
>             *****   ***    ***    ****  * *
>               *    *   *  *       *    * *
>SIGNATURE:  *  *    *   *   ***    ***
             *  *    *   *      *   *
>_____________**______***____***____****______________________________________
 
 
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52109 | STU_MXTHOMPS | PERSONALS            | 10/11/93 | 10/17/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52104: Reply to 52043: here we go ag                   |
================================================================================
 
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Megasus
>ADDRESS: vax1.acs.jmu.edu
>PHONE NUMBER: "I don't know, I never call myself" (that _is_ a RL quote)
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): 666-66-6666
>BIRTHDATE: a year before everyone else in my class
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): hmmm...how does one measure what one lacks?
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  procrastinate as much as possible but
                                      still get stuff done.
>
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  63
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Well he said that she said that your friend said you like
                    me."  Hey, haven't had to worry about that since 10th
                    grade...and this isn't an exact quote.
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: No line...just a general state of not-calling.
>SAT SCORES:  MATH_620_   VERBAL_660_  COMBINED__ it's not that hard to add up
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: hey, I can keep _some_ secrets!
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Lost count...sorry.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) a boyfriend
>                               2)
>                               3)
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: well...none, really.
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: it would help if I had some time
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>I don't- I just thought this would be fun to fill out.>>
             I kept JOSE~'s answer...it's tha same for me
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: silver
>FAVORITE FOOD: depends on what I feel like
>FAVORITE SONG: all of "Every Breath You Take, the Singles" --Police
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: preferably somewhere on the bed
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? no  RATING: 100 (I can dream)
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
I'm the Nice Girl...you can use ppl like me ;)
 
>SIGNATURE:  /| /|
            / |/ |  .-.  __    __
           /     |  \/  /  \  /  \| /| /|  /| /| /
>_________        \_/\_/\__/ /\__/|/_)/ \_/ |/_)/_______________________________
                       ___/_/
                      /  /              God, that was annoying :)
>                     \_/
>
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>
>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52117 | STU_BTNELSON | PERSONALS            | 10/11/93 | 10/18/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52043: here we go again...                             |
================================================================================
 
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Thor
>ADDRESS: Somewhere in Gifford
>PHONE NUMBER: X5741
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
>BIRTHDATE: March 19 1993
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): How many feet in a mile again?
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): Clue Free
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): mid 50's
>BEST PICKUP LINE: So, I hear you're still Breathing
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: Thank You!  Next!
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__  1190
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: Jr. Year High School
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Not Sure
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Something New
>                               2) Something Blue
>                               3) Somthing Borrowed
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: Almost all the time
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  Well don't want to start but like filling out
>                                 stuff
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):See above
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Blueish
>FAVORITE FOOD: Anything
>FAVORITE SONG: "The Name Game"
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Female Supirior (I'm lazy)
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: 7.5883243
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:  I got my
> own car
>
>
>            TTTTTT HH  HH  OOOOOO RRRR
>              TT   HHHHHH  OO  OO RR R
>SIGNATURE:    TT   HH  HH  OOOOOO RR  R
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52133 | STU_CFHARTSO | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: *sigh*    alright...guess I had to eventually                   |
================================================================================
 
whoa boy, I must be really bored to bite this bait....
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Cole Fike Hartson, Sexual Footman for the ancient God of
              hormones, Testiclesse the Great, and servant to the Fair Lady
              Butlic
>ADDRESS: 'Da Cave
>PHONE NUMBER: 4360
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): uh.... too many digits fer me to 'member.
>BIRTHDATE: winter, a while ago
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): yep. it's 'bout that long.
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): Winning an argument with a woman...I've
                       been told it's impossible, but I'm still trying     ;)
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): well, uh, 42, but don't
                                                      tell nobody
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Hi"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: uh, does "LISTEN YOU FUCKED UP CUNT, YOU WANNA PLAY YOUR
LITTLE FUCKING GAMES?!?!  HUH?!  HUH?! GO FUCK WITH SOMEBODY ELSE!" count even
though we were never going out?
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ 1280
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: age 15, but it sucked.
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): right, like I keep count.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Tie:Chocolate Syrup or Pop-Ice
>                               2) Spin dryers
>                               3) Disney-Land-Type rides
 
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>      Dont...just bored, thought I'd conform and fill this sucker out.
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: black
>FAVORITE FOOD:  Pizza w/Soy Cheese or Soy Icecream (I'm allergic 'ta milk)
>FAVORITE SONG:  Changes constantly w/o notice- at this exact moment, _Thank
                 You_ by Led Zep
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: well, one leg goes over here, and the other one goes
under here, then the other leg goes around here and that last one kinda fits
nicely right over there...but remember, 'ya gotta arch your back.
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes  RATING: I ain't tell'n
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
               Fast learner, not afraid of oral sex - regaurdless of what the
song implies, (JMU Yeastie Girls, you know who you are) some of us guys really
do enjoy it!
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:
>____________lil'ol me_______________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
 
~~~tsf@boredboredboredboredboredboredboiredboardboredboaredboredwhoredboredbo...

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| 52156 | CXSAUNDE     | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52043: here we go again...                             |
================================================================================
 
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): kristmas
>ADDRESS: Ummm, I dunno.  Where am I?
>PHONE NUMBER: Look it up.
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): If I don't have to, then I won't unless it's fun.
>BIRTHDATE: 4/20/75
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): Sorry, mine's in Charlottesville.
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): To figure out my goal in life.
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 59.2
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Ummm, sure.  No, I'm not busy then."
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "Wait, come back!"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH_750_   VERBAL_640_  COMBINED_You do the math._
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: Wednesday, July 15th, 1992, 1:26-2:43pm
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): I had to stop and really think,
>                                              but I came up with 24.5  times.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Brian
>                               2) Purple silk
>                               3) Chocolate pudding (I'm not kidding)
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: Sorry, I spend all my free time on the VAX.  *snicker*
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: I don't.  This is for the humor value.
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>
>         Not interrested, thank you.  I prefer to experiment.
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Purple-blue-green
>FAVORITE FOOD: Chocolate pudding
>FAVORITE SONG: Depends on my mood and what I'm trying to do....
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Well, my ceiling is only two feet above my loft,
                           so we do our best.  It's like being in a coffin....
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Not really.  RATING: He says
>    I'm incredible, and she once told me that I have the BEST hands....  :)
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>     I don't think you want to know.
>     I don't think I want you to know, more acurately stated.
>
>SIGNATURE:
>_______________kristmas______________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
I know.  I know.  I HATE that.  Then I have to wait for him to wake up.

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| 52157 | STU_C4CONDO  | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52133: *sigh*    alright...guess I h                   |
================================================================================
 
I know, I know... I just *had* to...
 
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): Christine 4organ Condo, Lady Kamikaze, also known as
             Madonna and "the dracula chick."
ADDRESS: New Orleans, the 93-94 Delta Alpha Kappa House
PHONE NUMBER: gee, sugar, haven'tcha memorized it yet?
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): uh... lemme get back to you...
BIRTHDATE: almost 21 years ago, in a galaxy far, far away...
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): -6 and 1/4 inches
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): to never let anyone see my natural
                                    hair color ever again.
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): whatsa matter, aintcha
                                                     been readin' the board
                                                     for the last few days?
BEST PICKUP LINE: "Actually, I just want to be friends."
BEST BREAKUP LINE: "Actually, I just want to be friends."
SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ 1280  (seems to be a pretty common
                                                 score 'round these parts...
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: I'd rather not say...
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA....
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Handcuffs
                               2) Key to Handcuffs
                               3) Bedpost
 
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): well, actually, I just
                                                   wanted to fill out the
                                                   form...
FAVORITE COLOR: any lack thereof.
FAVORITE FOOD:  if it's fattening, I probably like it.
FAVORITE SONG:  Cut You Up, by Peter Murphy... 
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: the possibilities are endless, but the brown
                          loveseat was always an ideal height...
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes  RATING: wouldn't you
                                                             like to know...
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
                 I promise to do all of my homework and practice
                 as frequently as possible.
 
SIGNATURE:
 
        /                /            / _/
       /      ___    ___/            /_/
      /      /  /   /  /   /  /     / \         (damn, that was a bitch.)
     /____  /__/_  /__/_  /__/     /   \
                            /           \
                         __/
 
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
 
yeah, well, what did you expect?

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| 52176 | STU_JFSHICKE | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: kill my process                                                 |
================================================================================
 
>
>i also still have many replies that i will post later.
>-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
>
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): jon
>ADDRESS:     a vax or chem lab in Miller
>PHONE NUMBER: Type "w"
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): nope, I'm not giving it out so you can register
    me for 19 credit hours divided between underwater
    basket weaving and  ROTC PT.
>BIRTHDATE:  14 May 71
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): Long enough for any reasonable purpose
 
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): To develop psychotrophic drugs that
 bring help to millions. Personal: Peace of mind (see above)
 
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):  60.2 and dropping
>BEST PICKUP LINE: I don't talk to strangers
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "Leave me alone"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__ 660  VERBAL_ 540 COMBINED__1200
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: My second?? year here (they're all
 starting to run together)
 
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Went through many boxes of
  condoms and foam.... dunno
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) female num-num's
>                               2) enthuastic partner
>                               3) what more do you need?
 
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:        I'll make time
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: ASAP - medical reasons
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
"help me keep it from falling off"
 
 
>FAVORITE COLOR:  depends
>FAVORITE FOOD:   most of the things that have taste and/or are bad
    for you. Ben and Jerry's (with cookie dough or
    this month's flavor - chocolate w/ peanut butter
    chunks.)
 
>FAVORITE SONG:   depends
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: like to switch positions a lot.
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? no.  RATING:
 
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 teach me, mold me, train me to make You melt into my arms in
 waves of ecstasy.
 
>SIGNATURE:
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
hey, who's teaching?
 
this was.... interesting. (let me guess, mav is making another file of
them.

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| 52181 | STU_JLBROWN  | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52043: here we go again...                             |
================================================================================
 
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Jennifer Lynn Brown, Cookie Woman, Skankett, Lady of Easy Virtue,
 Keeper of the num-nums
>ADDRESS:  Wonderland
>PHONE NUMBER: 433-5197
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): XXX-XX-XXXX
>BIRTHDATE:  12/09/70
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  i dunno...my wand is missing
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  to be a school teacher and corrupt kids
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 51.7 last time i checked
>BEST PICKUP LINE: so, you wanna come over and watch The Last Temptation of
 Christ?
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  don't have one yet
>SAT SCORES:  MATH_590_   VERBAL_580  COMBINED_1170_
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  sometime during fall semester, 1989
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): plenty
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) men
>                               2) bananas
>                               3) silk ties
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  between the hours of 5pm and 6am
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  ASAP
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  learning never ceases.
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR:  blue
>FAVORITE FOOD:  strawberries and champagne
>FAVORITE SONG:  varies daily
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  don't have a favorite
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes   RATIguess
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE: Cookie Woman
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52183 | STU_CCCABELL | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: ccconsider me gone!                                             |
================================================================================
 
>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>
>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>
>>NAME (FULL): Carrie Cartwright Cabell, cccrunchy a.k.a. cccarpediem, Duchess
of Sanity and Keeper of Peace
>>ADDRESS:  Deep Space 289
>>PHONE NUMBER: 434-7902
>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): not available at this time
>>BIRTHDATE:  March 18, 1972
>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): i require --> mutant size; for more
details, see accompanying application.
>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  M'lady, Secretary General, U.N.
>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): low fifties
>>BEST PICKUP LINE: you're only 17?
>>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  you're only 17?
>>SAT SCORES:  MATH_590_   VERBAL_600  COMBINED_1190_
>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  prior to freshman year... High School (13)
>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): 2^10
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) mutants
>>                               2) my roommate
>>                               3) fourth gear
>>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  anytime after i finish my thesis
>>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  after april 15
>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
 there must be more to life than this...
 
>>
>>
>>FAVORITE COLOR:  blue
>>FAVORITE FOOD:  anything italian, greek, or indian (applies to men too)
>>FAVORITE SONG:  Vibrator Dependent by Mojo Nixon
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  in the study, on the floor... with col. mustard
>>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes   RATING: nevermind
>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
having been told i'm a non-entity in this category, i submit this application
for those of you who might think so...
 
>>
>>
>>SIGNATURE: cccrunchy@so,myfatherstutters!
>>_____________________________________________________________________________
>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>
>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52188 | ALWARREN     | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/26/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52054: Reply to 52048: Reply to 5204                   |
================================================================================
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): Andrew Lee Warren
ADDRESS: Dock 4 Substation 32B
PHONE NUMBER: 411
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): 123-45-4321
BIRTHDATE: 8-27-75
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): 2pi in.
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): sex-lots of it-on a rollercoaster
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): n/a
BEST PICKUP LINE: The heartbeat of America is today's Chevy truck
BEST BREAKUP LINE: I love you Susie.. uhh. I mean, Elsie.. uhhh...
SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__  1290
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: Hmmm... Clarify!!
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): can't answer... grammatical
                                              conflict within question.
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) the Television
                               2) Barney
                               3) Knife
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: I'll TEACH the damn things!
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: sop(Whenever someone pays attention to him)
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): Because I said so.
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR: silver (Hi, Meg!)
FAVORITE FOOD: anything edible
FAVORITE SONG: Easy to be Hard (from "HAIR")
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: 68
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes RATING: 3.14159265358979
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 
Sex is sexy if you do it right.
 
SIGNATURE:
 +    /\   _____                     _____    ___ +
     /  \ +  |  |        /\    |\ + |  |   | (   \
    /    \   |  |  x    /  \   | \  |  |   |  \___
   /------\  |  |      /____\  |  \ |  |   |      \
  /  +     \ |  |____ /   +  \ |   \|  |   |  x    )
 _________________________________________________/
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52199 | STU_NEWALDMA | PERSONALS            | 10/12/93 | 10/19/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52181: Reply to 52043: here we go ag                   |
================================================================================
 
 
i felt so left out, i *had* to do this.... ;)
 
 
>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>
>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>
>>NAME (FULL): Nancy Elizabeth Waldman, Trinc, LYDIAmoto, Grand Hostess and
Keeper of the Key, Plug, Barnicle Butch the Sailor, Butch Chickadee, etc...
>
>>ADDRESS:  New Orleans, NOVA, San Diego....(not all at once, mind you)
>>PHONE NUMBER:  what do i get if i tell you? ;)
>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):  ha!  you'll have to steal my id for *that* one!
>>BIRTHDATE:  04/03/73, aries with capricornian traits...i had star chart
that was done on my birthday.
>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  lack thereof...definitely lack thereof
>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  to have lots of great sex and to have
my daddy win the lottery so i neveer have to work.
>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): last time i took it was
over a year ago...then it was @85% pure....but *alot* has happened... ;)
>>BEST PICKUP LINE: what's a pickup line?  *doe eyes*
>>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  do i always attract losers, or is it just you?
>>SAT SCORES:  MATH_____   VERBAL____  COMBINED_1170_  sometin like that
>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  August 1993
>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): not enough for my liking, i'll
tell you that!!!
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) feathers
>>                               2) massages
>>                               3) hot caramel
>>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  MF after 2 pm..and wednesdays after 7:30...weekends
you have to call for an appointment.
>>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  whenever...
>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  cuz i'm horny, dammit!!!
>>
>>
>>
>>FAVORITE COLOR:  royal purple, ruby red, hunter green, blues...
>>FAVORITE FOOD:  cherries and melted chocolate...
>>FAVORITE SONG:  LONGER
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  you mean people actually have preferences?  wow.
>>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yeah, but i don't think it
was very flattering.   RATING?  see previous statement
>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
 well, ummmm....i dunno.  do i get to do extra credit?
>>
>>SIGNATURE: LYDIAmoto
>>_____________________________________________________________________________
>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>
>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52212 | STU_MLGRIGSB | PERSONALS            | 10/13/93 | 10/19/93 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52199: Reply to 52181: Reply to 5204                   |
================================================================================
 
>
>i felt so left out, i *had* to do this.... ;)
>  ditto, nancy. =-)
>
>>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>>
>>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>>
>>>NAME (FULL): Michael Lynn Grigsby (a/k/a misha, misha/catullus, miguelito,
mikey, kitrkitty, AirFrance, queerboy, etc, etc.)
 
>>>ADDRESS:  Bridgewater, home of the dickless ('cept me =-) )
>>>PHONE NUMBER:  check any bathroom wall.
>>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):  refuse to comply...us freedom of info. act.
>>>BIRTHDATE: 11/05/71 (year of the boar, scorpio [who ruleth the genitals]
 
>>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  ask me... maybe i'll let you feel.
>>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  A)  Classical Philologist at a decent
university; B)  to finally find a boyfriend/husband/whatever
 
>>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 35 and falling...
 
>>>BEST PICKUP LINE: mmmph!  yes! YES!  YESSS!
>>>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  let your brother know when you get off heroin.
>>>SAT SCORES:  MATH_650   VERBAL 740  COMBINED_1390
>>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  12/23/89  (jesus!)
>>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): # of partners?  # of orgasms?
i'll go with number of orgasms and say 7,000.
>>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) rubber spatula
>>>                               2) astroglide
>>>                               3) my gerbil
>>>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  only after 10 pm.
>>>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  when you're free.
>>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  cos brian is in CT
>>>FAVORITE COLOR:  yellow today.
>>>FAVORITE FOOD:  curried squid/ sushi/ sashimi
>>>FAVORITE SONG:  darling nikki
>>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  sated.
>>>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? da.
   RATING?  diez
>>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
> ask me.  maybe i'll let ya feel.
>>>
>>>SIGNATURE:
>>>__
 
*        *       *******      *******    *     *         *
*  *   *           *         *           *     *        * *
*    *   *         *           *         *******       *   *
*        *         *           *         *     *      *  *  *
*        *         *         *           *     *     *       *
*        *       ********   *            *     *    *         *
 
ok, so i'm not an artist.
 
 
 
 
 
___________________________________________________________________________
>>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>>
>>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 52233 | STU_LTCZAJKO | PERSONALS            | 10/13/93 | 10/26/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52181: Reply to 52043: here we go ag                   |
================================================================================
 
>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>
>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>
>>NAME (FULL): Lisa Therese Czajkowski, Linebacker, death, strange lass
>>ADDRESS:  Maaaaaaaaaaad Manor
>>PHONE NUMBER: 433-7961
>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): XXX-XX-XXXX
>>BIRTHDATE:  4/16/70
>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  lack thereof, and i think i lost the one
i was borrowing due to lack of communicative skills
>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  mediate, and have some self-respect
>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 30 something, i can't
remember
>>BEST PICKUP LINE: (on a bus)  God, I hate bridges!!!!
>>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  none of them were very good.
>>SAT SCORES:  MATH_480_   VERBAL_640  COMBINED_1120_
>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  summer, 1988
>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): lots n lots
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) can of whipped cream (flavor optional)
>>                               2) plastic wrap
>>                               3) kimono tie
>>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  times change, need to make an appointment
>>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  is there a final?  things i need to know
before i make a decision...
>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  see if i missed anything
along the way
>>
>>
>>
>>FAVORITE COLOR:  indigo
>>FAVORITE FOOD:  ben and jerry's new york super fudge chunk, en masse
>>FAVORITE SONG:  Turkish Song of the Damned, the Pogues  (today)
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  bent over a chair
>>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? uh uh.
>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>SIGNATURE: Strange Lass, iamtoocrankyeventoenjoythis.
>>_____________________________________________________________________________
>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>
>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.            YYYYYIIIIIIHHHHHHHHHAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!

-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 52354 | LSBUMGAR     | PERSONALS            | 10/16/93 | 10/21/93 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 52133: *sigh*    alright...guess I h                   |
================================================================================
 
>whoa boy, I must be really bored to bite this bait....
>>---------^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^-----------------------------
>>
>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>
>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>
>>NAME (FULL): L.S. Garp
>
>
>>ADDRESS: hoffman
>>PHONE NUMBER: yeh, right
>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): uhhhh, something with 227 in it
>>BIRTHDATE: winter, 73
>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): biggern' yours
>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): write for the Post,be news editor of
breeze
>
>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 80 something
>
>>BEST PICKUP LINE: By the way, did I tell you I had a penis?
>>BEST BREAKUP LINE: uh, things just aren't working out
 
>>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ 1120
>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: huh huh huh huh he said virginity
>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): no comment
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) don't
>>                               2)     know
>>                               3)         yet
>
>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>>      Dont...just bored, thought I'd conform and fill this sucker out.
           dito
>>
>>FAVORITE COLOR: blue
>>FAVORITE FOOD:  Pizza
>>FAVORITE SONG:  three way tie: I all I want is you, by u2; I am the walrus
and Hey Jude by The Beatles, right now at least
>
>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: uhh..nah..
>>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? no  RATING:
>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>               don't care enough to think about it
>>
>>
>>
>>
>>SIGNATURE:
>>____________L.S. Garp______________________________________________________
>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>
>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
>
>
I've wasted a little time...got to go to work
>.

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| 52373 | STU_DPCAMPBE | PERSONALS            | 10/17/93 | 10/24/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description:                                                                 |
================================================================================
 
Well, since it seems like everyone and their mother has filled this nosy little
form out, I guess I'll just splinter under the awesome weight of peer
pressure like the gutless sniveling worm I am and do likewise.
 
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
NAME (FULL):  Douglas Patrick (hulio) Campbell
ADDRESS: The increasingly inaptly named Funhouse
PHONE NUMBER: x5054
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
BIRTHDATE: 12/06/74
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): tsk tsk tsk.  Tacky question.  Very tacky.
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): to be the first S.L.A.G. groupie
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 89%
BEST PICKUP LINE: "Hi, I find you very attractive, so I'm sure we'll have a
very close platonic relationship."
BEST BREAKUP LINE: I haven't had a need to use one for obvious reasons.  "You
stupid bitch, you ruined my life!" has an appealing sort of ring, though.
SAT SCORES:  MATH_600   VERBAL_710  COMBINED_1310
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: It's still hangin' around.  Cookie Woman keeps
saying she's gonna do something about that, but I remain skeptical.  My guess
would be never.
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): 0.00
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Spam
                               2) Angst
                               3) Surface-To-Air missiles
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: 24-7
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: 10/17/87 (you're a tad late, dammit!)
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): I don't wanna die a virgin.
FAVORITE COLOR: black
FAVORITE FOOD: Something not from d-hall
FAVORITE SONG: "Freaks" by Marillion
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Positions? There's positions?  Whoa, you learn
somethin' new everyday.
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Nope   RATING:
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: I have
learned to accept rejection as an inherent part of my life, thank you very
much.
 
SIGNATURE: The Rgt. Hon. Rev. Joker
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
 

-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 52620 | STU_BDREID   | CHATTER              | 10/25/93 | 11/08/93 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000001                   |
================================================================================
 
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): Professor Grff D. Reid, Esq., MS, DDS, BTU
ADDRESS: The Maxwell House, 322-A Olde South High St.
PHONE NUMBER: 1-900-SCRUNCHY
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): yeah, right.
BIRTHDATE: 7/27/71
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): you want that in land or
                                   nautical miles?
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): to bring about the social
                                    and economic collapse of
                                    several first-world countries
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): high 70s
BEST PICKUP LINE: You know, of all the restaurants I've been to,
                  I'd rather be dining at the Y.
BEST BREAKUP LINE: Have you always been this psycho or am I just
                   now noticing it?
SAT SCORES:  the SATs, like the GREs, are irrelevant in modern
             educational circles as measures of scholastic ability,
             but i got a 1250
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: sometime in 1987, i think
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): i honestly don't
remember, as it was over a year ago and not that memorable.
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) gravel
                               2) a local 110-volt power source
                               3) yer mother
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: i'll MAKE time
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: 1987, it was a humbling experience
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): hey, there's
gotta be a whole unexplored world out there, and i'm just the guy
to tackle its butt and grind it into the ground.
 
FAVORITE COLOR: plaid
FAVORITE FOOD: home-brewed beer
FAVORITE SONG: "Cold Sweat" by James Brown
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: on the receiving end of the
                          Human Japanese Spin-Fuck Chair
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yep.  RATING: too many
                                                      zeros for your
                                                      feeble brain to
                                                      comprehend.
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
     Sex just wouldn't be sex without the tangy zip of Miracle Whip!
 
 
SIGNATURE: grff!
 
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 57678 | STU_JGDRUMMO | PERSONALS            | 02/28/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
>(sorry....had to do it)
>--mav
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): James 0mar Gastby III
>ADDRESS: 105 Ashby Hall
>PHONE NUMBER: x4360
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): none of yer damn business
>BIRTHDATE: 2345 years in the future
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): Never measured. Satisfactory, I presume.
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): To find a new goal in life.
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 50
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Like my new hamster?"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "So... how was he?"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__  Too long ago... uh... 1370 (?)
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: age 14
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Umm... umm... about THIS much...
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)Mary
>                               2)Hamsters
>                               3)Myself (hey, I'm not proud!)
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: 4:00-4:01PM, Wednesday, Feb. 30, 1994
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:       """"
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): Boredom during the day
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Purple
>FAVORITE FOOD: MEAT
>FAVORITE SONG: "Why don't we get drunk and screw"
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: IN.
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?  Nope.  RATING: Ok, I guess.
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: I'm
sterile.
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:  scribblescribble
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
splat.
 
-Omar

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| 57679 | STU_BTNELSON | PERSONALS            | 02/28/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
Well This is always Fun :)
>
>(sorry....had to do it)
>--mav
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Thor
>ADDRESS: JMU Box 2438
>PHONE NUMBER:  X5741
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): --- -- ----
>BIRTHDATE: 03/19/73 (Coming up SOON)
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  Good Enough For Me
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  To Find the Good Hugs
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 57
>BEST PICKUP LINE: You Look Puckered, Can I get you a Kiss
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: Never Broke up with anyone
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__    1190
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: Sr. Year HS
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): Um.....
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)  Silk Ribbons
>                               2)  Mr Bubble
>                               3)  Hot Wax
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  You make the Call, I'll make the Time
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:  ASAP
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): Got a lot of Free time
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Blue
>FAVORITE FOOD: Sweet and Sour Chicken
>FAVORITE SONG: Varies
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: Female Superior
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: 9
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:  THOR
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 57680 | STU_MPZLOGAR | PERSONALS            | 02/28/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
------------------------------------------------------------------------
             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
                    **student teachers now available**
 
 
PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
 
NAME (FULL): michael peter zlogar
ADDRESS: the angsthouse
PHONE NUMBER: x4054
S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): no way
BIRTHDATE: 9/22/73
LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): "oh my GOD!"
GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): happiness and the divine cup of coffee
PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): low fourties
BEST PICKUP LINE: "hi, i'm z"
BEST BREAKUP LINE: "just get the fuck out"
SAT SCORES:  MATH: 500   VERBAL: 720  COMBINED: 1220
WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: august 5, 1989 (age 15)
PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): more than counted on fingers/toes
FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) my girlfriend
                               2) cookie woman
                               3) your mom
TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: inbetween meals, or after brushing
DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: march 1, 2014
WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): need something interesting
to do during midlife crisis.
 
 
 
FAVORITE COLOR: purple
FAVORITE FOOD: what you're wearing
FAVORITE SONG: in your eyes
FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: female superior, rotate female 180 degrees
HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? y  RATING: 10 (but it was
you-know-who, so that doesn't really count)
ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: anything
drugs can do i can do with my tongue.
 
 
 
 
SIGNATURE:  x      oh wait, i mean   z
_____________________________________________________________________________
PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
 
FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
i can hardly contain myself.
 
z :)

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| 57686 | STU_MLGRIGSB | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     5    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
>>Hey... wasn't there a sort of form you could fill out for this
>>category?
>>Just wondering what sort of info was required...
>>
>>inky@forafriendyeahsurethat'stheticket
>
>ask and receive...  ;)
>
>(sorry....had to do it)
>--mav
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL):  grigorev, mikhail pavlovich
>ADDRESS: look it up
>PHONE NUMBER: 1-900-hot-buns
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):?
>BIRTHDATE: i refuse to answer this question on the grounds that i'm tired
of all the pretty little 18-year-olds who think they can get whatever the
FUCK they want just by virtue of the very fact that they're 4 years younger
than i am...oops.
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  6.5.  units optional
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): career:  make lotsa money.
 personal:  settle down with hong kong phooey and open the best goddamned
 laundry service on the west coast.
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 43
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "enough with the schoenberg, already."
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "yeah, whatever.*snap*"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH650   VERBAL740  COMBINED figure it out, einstein.
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: when i was one of those goddamned 18 year old
pretty boys i was just moaning and pissing about.
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): hm.... total # of orgasms:3000
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) the num-num wand
>                               2) having problems coming up with fresh ideas.
>                               3)
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: never.
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: why not tonight, oh lord, why not tonight.
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>     oh, fuck if i know... i could teach the fuckin' classes.
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: yellow
>FAVORITE FOOD: sushi
>FAVORITE SONG: "seks bez pereriva" by bogdan titomir
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: at this point???? are you kidding?   sex is SEX.
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes.  RATING: 10 (that's only
 happened ONCE, mind you...
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
i'm really really really really really horny.>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:
 
 
 
                    x  x   x    x
    x   x     x   x x  x   x    x
   x x x x    x  x  x  x   x    x    ( a very sad attempt at a cyrillic
  x   x   x   x     x   xxxxxxxxx      rendering of mish).
 
 
 
 
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 57691 | MALESTER     | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): Satan, Malester, Bitch, The Evil One, etc.
>ADDRESS: Hell
>PHONE NUMBER: 1-800-KILL-NOW
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): 666-6666
>BIRTHDATE: Um, er....a long time ago, in a land far, far away.
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): Definite lack thereof.
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): Fuck Art Lets Kill
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):um..sinking ship?
>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Can you hand me that knife?"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "What's your name again?"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__    um...1200?
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: Who would sleep with the devil?!
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): I failed math.
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) Nick
>                               2) Knives (sharpened)
>                               3) Anything black
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: FREE?! I'm an art major. No free time.
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: Um....I'll call you later...or something.
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>
> Well, I need a new victim.
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: Black
>FAVORITE FOOD:  Amaretto...
>FAVORITE SONG:  Kanon in D Major
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  Does christmas bondage count?
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? Yes   RATING: about 12
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>   It's been to long since my last kill...and I would hate to waste a good
>   Boyfriend on that...
>
>SIGNATURE: 666
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 
  Um, yeah. Spelled it wrong, though.
 
  Ugh.

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| 57693 | STU_MPCAREY  | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
Well, it looks like I get to add my little bit to this sorry ass crew.  =-)
 
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL):Matthew Paul Carey
>ADDRESS:USA
>PHONE NUMBER:(123)456-78910
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):111-69-4444
>BIRTHDATE:012974 Therefore I am 20...
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):I'll show only on request... =-)
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):to be God
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE):33
>BEST PICKUP LINE:"I couldn't help you noticing me..."
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:"Did you actually think that those were *real* orgasms?"
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ 1190 ( I think )
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:14
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES):lost count for this week... =-)
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1)tongue
>                               2)ice
>                               3)vibrator
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:huh huh huh... yeah, right.  I'm a music major.
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES:yesterday
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):there has to be some reason
why my mommie and daddy are paying through the ass for me to go here besides get
laid every other hour.
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR:whatever I'm wearing that day.
>FAVORITE FOOD:whatever I'm eating that day... no pun intended.
>FAVORITE SONG:Vogue or Dreamlover
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:just about anything will do and I have done.  =-)
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? yes  RATING:10
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>I have this way with changing my hair color more often than my bed sheets.  =-)
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:
#3Matthew P. Carey
#4Matthew P. Carey
 
sorry, I had to do it.  =-)
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 57695 | STU_JFSHICKE | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/15/94 |     3    |
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| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): just "jon"
>ADDRESS: Miller
>PHONE NUMBER: do a loc who, fool
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):
>BIRTHDATE: it's directory information
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): adequate for any reasonable purpose
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): I don't want to grow up.....
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 60.2
>BEST PICKUP LINE: me talk to a female I don't know?
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "but we can still be friends" (ugh. i said that)
>SAT SCORES:  MATH__   VERBAL_  COMBINED__ 1200
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: I lost it, but I took one of those pills and
                                 it was restored.
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): mc^2
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) (still looking for #1)
>                               2) peach schnapps
>                               3) EDT
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: We'll work something out
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: 2/28/94
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>          There's only so much you can learn from a book.
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR: varies
>FAVORITE FOOD:  Ben & Jerry's
>FAVORITE SONG:
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: ask me
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10?   RATING: dunno
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>    The tables in m135 are nice......
>
>
>SIGNATURE:
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.

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| 57703 | STU_LTCZAJKO | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 57680: Reply to 57677: (who wants to                   |
================================================================================
 
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL): lisa t. czajkowski
>ADDRESS: the house of the red death
>PHONE NUMBER: 433-7961
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL):what's that got to do with anything?
>BIRTHDATE: 4/16/70  you do the math.
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): definite lack thereof
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): career: mediate, personal: open a jar of
hot peppers by myself (without that stupid tupperware thing)
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 34
>BEST PICKUP LINE: ;)
>BEST BREAKUP LINE:  "bye."
>SAT SCORES:  MATH: horribly poor  VERBAL: decent  COMBINED: i got here, and
that's enuff said.
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY:  when i did all those drugs in the 60s.
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): plenty
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  who needs toys?  ;)
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: um, free time?
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: after i get out of jail.
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS): macrame just doesn't cut it
anymore.
>FAVORITE COLOR: faded jean blue
>FAVORITE FOOD: uhhhhhhhh, spaghetti.
>FAVORITE SONG: right now, ace of spades by motorhead (go figure)
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: the one where your brain falls out.
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? nope  RATING:
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE: i have
a year's supply of mr. bubble.
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE:  lisa t.
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
>
>yippie!
>
>

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| 57704 | SXTURABI     | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     3    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 57677: (who wants to be the student                    |
================================================================================
 
>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>                    **student teachers now available**
>
>
>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>
>NAME (FULL):  Shabina Sameena Husaini Turabali
>ADDRESS:  Holy Nunnery of St. Miller
>PHONE NUMBER:  1-800-VIRGIN
>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): no
>BIRTHDATE:  same as tce
>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF):  Lack thereof
>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL):  career and personal:  to die a virgin
>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 117
>BEST PICKUP LINE:  "Would you like to see what is underneath this habit?"
>BEST BREAKUP LINE: "No, I won't sleep with you."
>SAT SCORES:  MATH 760   VERBAL 690 COMBINED 1450
>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: hopefully, never
>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): 0
>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) hand
>                               2) ruler
>                               3) rosary beads
>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES:  after mass and before supper
>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: tomorrow
>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):  So I can educate others
on the virtues of chastity and abstinence.  *giggle*
>
>
>
>FAVORITE COLOR:  white
>FAVORITE FOOD:  ice cubes
>FAVORITE SONG:  "Never Gonna Get It"  by En Vogue
>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION:  on my knees, in prayer of course
>HAS ANYONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? no  RATING:
>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:  I find
great satisfaction in my relationship with God, no matter what you all say, it
is healthy, it is!
>
>
>
>
>SIGNATURE: the resident virgin
>_____________________________________________________________________________
>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>
>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.
 

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| 57707 | SRCARTER     | PERSONALS            | 03/01/94 | 03/14/94 |     4    |
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
| Description: Reply to 57706: Reply to 57686: Reply to 5767                   |
================================================================================
 
>
>>>------------------------------------------------------------------------
>>>             APPLICATION FOR THE MAVERICK SCHOOL OF SEXUALITY
>>>                    **student teachers now available**
>>>
>>>
>>>PLEASE FILL IN THE FOLLOWING:
>>>
>>>NAME (FULL):  Carter, Samuel Roberts Inky Ro-bear Diseased Alien Warrior
>>>ADDRESS: look it up
>>>PHONE NUMBER: pdir
>>>S.S. NUMBER (OPTIONAL): never served in S.S.
>>>BIRTHDATE: 3/28/75
>>>LENGTH OF PENIS (OR LACK THEREOF): 6.2 Kalikams +/- .003%  error
>>>GOAL IN LIFE (CAREER AND PERSONAL): Career: Student Ambassador
>  Personal:  find the secret of   "Special  K"
>>>PURITY TEST SCORE (500 QUESTION--MOST RECENT SCORE): 45
>>>BEST PICKUP LINE: "Did you  knit that yourself?"
>>>BEST BREAKUP LINE:"*click*"
>>>SAT SCORES:  MATH600   VERBAL690  COMBINED did worse on math, o.k.?!?
>>>WHEN LOST/WILL LOSE VIRGINITY: 1/31/90
>>>PREVIOUS SEXUAL EXPERIENCE (NUMBER OF TIMES): lots
>
>>>FAVORITE SEXUAL TOYS (TOP 3):  1) mixer
>                                 2) old tires
>                                 3)particle accelerator
>>>TIMES FREE FOR CLASSES: do not acknowledge radian time measurement
>>>DATE YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES: when urge becomes too  great
>>>WHY YOU WISH TO BEGIN CLASSES (100 WORDS OR LESS):
>>>     Need credit hours and don't want to do may session.
>>>     Willing  to do  homework
>>>
>>>FAVORITE COLOR: ultra-violet
>>>FAVORITE FOOD: combination of coffee and....(insert here)
>>>FAVORITE SONG: "Bigmouth Strikes Again" Smiths
>>>FAVORITE SEXUAL POSITION: constant rotation
>>>HAS ANONE EVER RATED YOU ON A SCALE FROM 1-10? nope.  :(  RATING:N/A
>>>ADDITIONAL COMMENTS YOU THINK MAY BE BENEFICIAL TO YOUR ACCEPTANCE:
>
>Sat through Channel 55   marathon  on V-Day
>
>
>>>>SIGNATURE:
>
>  :( sig.dat is in other account.  Too lazy to go get...
>
>   *inky*
 
>>
>>
>>
>>>_____________________________________________________________________________
>>PLEASE RETURN COMPLETED APPLICATION WITHIN A WEEK.  APPLICATION WILL BE
>>>PROCESSED AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.
>>>
>>>FIRST SERVED, FIRST COME.