-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 76416 | WHITELA      | CHATTER              | 05/24/96 | 05/31/96 |     2    |
| Description: Reply to 76415: Reply to 76409: Reply to 7640                   |

Secret Toilet Seat Recovery Program
Code Name:  Operation Bitches
Agent:  Omar
Your Mission, Should You Choose to Accept It:  Show the members of
 the Haven that toilet seats aren't *really* necessary.
Plan A:  Friday evening, Omar visits the Haven, ostensibly to watch
 The X-Files with 'Weed and Meg.  During the course of the show,
 his Secret Behind the Scenes Helpers jam the airwaves with
 pictures of Antonio Bandera's cute bare butt.  During the
 disturbance, Omar unlocks the kitchen window.
 That night, dressed in a black ninja outfit and face grease,
 Omar enters the Haven through the unlocked window, and
 steals the seats.
Plan B:  Omar puts together a possee, all members of Men Encouraging
 the Abolishment of Toilet Seats (MEATS).  They array themselves
 in Kevlar and Camoflage and Bandoliers, storm the Haven, and
 take Sasha the Vampire Cat hostage.  In exchange for her return,
 they demand the Haven's toilet seats.
Plan C:  Omar puts on a big trenchcoat (believeable excuse:  "i have to
 go work in the cooler, and i've lost my leather jacket again"),
 goes to the Haven, asks to use their bathroom, and smuggles the
 seat out in his coat.
Compensation:  6 Mickeys and a Sense of Satisfaction.