-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages --- | 58847 | STU_PLCAMPBE | CHATTER | 04/27/94 | 05/11/94 | 4 | -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- | Description: Beer me one last time. | ================================================================================ FUCK (I wanted my last post to have profanity on line ONE, godFUCKINGdammit) I Paul "tuna" Campbell, being of sound mind (granting soberness) and big 'ol hoss body do hereby serve notice that upon my graduation I am giving the fuck away the following: To shay (aka sexturbine): My swarthy swagger... it'll be hard to use it, given that my legs are a tad longer than yours. To solon: The knowledge that my god is better. To Z: A large caliber handgun with 6 bullets in it. Play russian roulette! If not that then at least a healthy dose of humility. To Kev: The sphinctometer, it's only fair since the 2 largest quakes in the 'burg were both as a direct result of a comment you made (one of which being something about a certain person being the dexatrim to his sexual appetite... now THAT is funny!). To Atlantis: Supermenu sucks dick. To malester: A white tee-shirt. To evil maria: Well, I would give you my killer instinct, but That would probably be a sedative to you. ;) To Omar: nothing. I reckon evil maria keeps you too busy to enjoy anything I'd give you anyways. To tsf: My alarm clock. Set it at about midnight. When it goes off, that means it's time to go to bed. To Shadowfax: Beer. To blackbird: 3 inches of height. ;) To 'badlands: nothing. You're a fucking waste of flesh already. ;) To meg: My winning personality. You've been after just about everything else I have! To Thor: Nothing. You a fuckin' hoss, you don't need anything. To Misha: "Dude, women are COOL." ;) To Poppy: Water. Drink some BEFORE you pass out! To Hoser (JOSE): Get a life you fucking slug. ;) To bum: See above. To priap: same fucking thing, loser. To Hulio: The knowledge that beer is the one and true god, and you will rot in soberland for all of your blaspheming. To islander: A bannana soap full bust of butthead, so you can pray to your god. (see above about rotting in soberland) To strangelass: My tire iron. Use it to educate Frankie on how often to do the dishes. To my baby sister: My shoes. You'll fill them before long, I reckon. To me: The gas truck. Not one of you assholes are hossy enough to drive it. So the gas truck comes with me. To JMU in general: My ass, which you can kiss repeatedly. So long you fucks. It's been tolerable by the grace of beer. tuna