-- Num ---- Username ---- Category ------------- Posted -- Expires --- Pages ---
| 75488 | SULLIVCG     | CHATTER              | 03/26/96 | 04/01/96 |     5    |
| Description: Reply to 75479: Reply to 75465: Reply to 7544                   |

>>the image of john in a grass skirt going up a smoking volcano
>>and chanting some ritual nonsense while he sacrifices all of us
>>in the name of chatter....
>By the Holy Claws of Klortho the Great. . .
>not /all/ of you.
OMAR: By the Holy Claws of Klortho the Great, I summon all Chatterites under
my realm to be selected to be thrown into the volcano.  Any volunteers?

OMAR: Well, then, I shall have to randomly select the sacrifices to appease the
Chatter Gods!  Eeny meeny miney -- AH, fuck it!  PING!  Come forth!
PING!:  What?  What?  Am I getting a reward?  A promotion to Chiefer Whipping
Boy?  What?
OMAR:  No, I'm throwing your lame-posting-ass into this here volcano.
PING!:  Oh, jolly good.  Continue.
OMAR:  What are you waiting for, did you think I'd actually pick YOU up and
THROW you in?  Get the fuck up there and lob yourself to your firey death!
PING!:  Oh, right.  AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhh   
OMAR:  Now then, I shall randomly select another sacrifice.  Ummmmm...YOU!
With the bowl!  I hate you, don't I?
C'mere R00j: What?  Man, fuck you!  Just because I can pimp better than you can
AND made a card game of it doesn't give your heart-attack prone ass the right
to pick me to jump into some hole in the ground!
OMAR:  Right.  Say, can I have a hit?
C'mere R00j: What?  Ummm...sure, here man...don't you need fire?
OMAR: Don't worry, I've got my own.  
C'mere R00j: NOOOOOOO!!!!  
Volcano: Fuuuuuuuck...
OMAR: Okay then, we need some bitches.  I nominate Grendel to select one from
the group.
Grendel:   What the fuck does it matter?!
OMAR: Yes, but, a few are...
Grendel: NO!  Throw them ALL in.  Now.  I have a Rage tournament to go to.
OMAR:  But, we need SOME to...
Grendel: No.
OMAR: Say, can I see your Rage deck?
Grendel?  What, oh yeah, sure...here...
 Well, you get the idea of the story.  Eventually, everyone dies,
whether Omar meant to kill them all or not.
Moral of the story: You can make anyone do anything if you take their most
prized possession away from them.